Throw together some armor made from whatever is on hand and works. Rap some duct tape around a rattan stick, maybe throw on a heavy rubber ax or hammer head. Pack it up and drive to a hot & humid, often stormy spot in Western PA. Haul it up the hill to the "Field" in the morning. If you pass safety inspection, get a sticker and then you sit in the sun until things begin. When the canon sounds you then go beat the ever living crap out of each other until the "Marshals" call "HOLD!!" You sweat so much that only handfuls of pickles, green olives and gallons of water are keeping your brain working as the hot summer sun bakes it in the portable pizza oven you call a helmet. And don't forget all the god awful chafing, in the worst places. Later the night you drink beer and compare bruises with the guy who gave them to you. Pensic is coming!
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